You're Gonna Love This /// Music Monday #29

You guys are in for a treat today!

Do you remember that song called "So Far Away"? You know, the one that won the Music Monday 2017 Awards? Well, it just so happens that I've got another song by the very talented artist Gabriel Brown today.

"Say" from the album Getting Stronger

Composed by Gabriel Brown and Nathanael Brown

In case I haven't said it enough, Getting Stronger is a top-notch album. Like, it's one of my favorite lyrical albums of all time. And I can't say that one song is the best. They're all excellent, each with its own unique musical style and themes. But I'd definitely say that this song is my jam, and the best part of the whole thing is the message.

In the description, Gabriel briefly says that he's had to deal with bullies, and this song is about how he dealt with them. In short: he didn't let their opinions of how he should be and act affect him. He stayed true to his nature and was proud of who he was.

Here's my personal take on it: we all have something to say to the world. God made us that way. For me, my stories are a means of communicating not just entertainment, but real truths to the masses. Some people have art as their own way of speaking. They convey things through their drawings or paintings. Others play music, are talented communicators, design video games, dance . . . there's a host of different talents and abilities. And they're our proverbial mouth, our way of telling people something important.

But in life, you will always have folks with the crab bucket mentality. If you've never heard of it, it's referencing what happens when you put two crabs in a bucket. Should one attempt to escape, the other will drag it back down. Misery does indeed love company, it seems. People are the same way. You try to do more, to better your world and those around you, to have an impact and make a difference. The crabs will always try to pull you down, but you can't let them.

The way to do that is to recognize that God made you in a particular way for a particular time and a particular purpose. Don't try to change yourself to appease the masses. God's approval is worth far more than mere human praise. Do your best to ignore the mockers, believe that you are valuable, and, as the song says, "Say what you need to say."

Your family can't do it. Your friends can't do it. Your neighbors can't do it. No one in the world can do it. Only you can speak the words that God has put on your heart. So go ahead.

Say them.

Well, I did not mean for that to turn into a miniature sermon, but here we are! (Props to you if you get the joke.) Did you like the song? What meaning does it hold for you? Are you glad I finally shared another masterpiece by Gabriel Brown?

Another (Lengthy) Dose of Death /// Humble Beginnings, Part 12

I've got some good news and some bad news. The bad news is that this is the third last Humble Beginnings post for my old story. The good news is that the chapter we're covering today is a longer one, from the looks of things. So that'll probably make this post longer too. Yay! Buckle up, children, we're going for a wild ride.

source

Don't ask why I called you children or why I included a weird Nicholas Cage gif.

A MESSAGE FROM THE JOSIAH OF THE FUTURE: This post is super long, possibly the longest Humble Beginnings post I've ever written. I debated separating it into two, but decided to keep it as one for simplicity's sake. If you find this too drawn-out or boring, I apologize.

Warren stood beside the rail of one of the rebel warships, pondering on the mystery of Hcol's death. Smits had just told him the news before leaving the sea vessel. Who would kill the prisoner and two knights without an obvious reason?

Personally, I'm not sure why Smits would tell Warren this, as it doesn't really pertain to him. I mean, maybe it's good to know, but I feel like it was done more for the reader's sake than Warren's. Also, some psychopaths just kill without reason, but my first--and perhaps the most obvous--guess is that someone didn't want Hcol spilling the beans about anything. You're a soldier, dude! I'm not one, and that was super easy to think up.

David and Mark neared their friend. "All the ships are set and ready to go," informed David. "We have a transport boat loaded with supplies to bring to the garrison we stop at. Plus, a Follower warship is carrying snow gear in case we need to head over Zracs. All of the treaty papers are in the watercraft as well."

Thanks for the clunky exposition, David. You also forgot to add the word "to" when you mentioned heading over to Zracs. And you used "watercraft" because words like "boat" and "ship" had just been said.

Smits watched them leave. "Godspeed to you, and may Detrius protect you."

Nice POV jump. I'm so glad younger me was committed to sticking with one character's head per scene.

The humans' fort was ample, hidden from sunlight by a rock formation that cast a shadow on the base. There was a cool basement, where the troops slept and got relief from the hot light. It was here that a conversation took place between the Chosen Ones.

Aw, man! What an amazing fortress! I can just totally see it in my mind's eye . . . What do you mean, you can't? There's clearly enough description given. *shakes my head* People these days, wanting more and more details on how places look.

"I don't get it. We're supposed to help find the Chosen Ones, and suddenly we're them," Warren said. "It's not like I don't want to be a Chosen One, but I just think I'm not cut out for the job. It's like there's a weight on my shoulders, now that I know we have to confront Leviathan and Behemoth."

None of us get it, Warren. You're not alone in this struggle.

"Don't worry, Warren," David assured. "Detrius will strengthen us. With Him, we can defeat anyone."

"David, how can you be so calm? I mean, aren't you afraid?" Mark wondered.

 The major shrugged. "Sure I am. Yet I know that Revier has a plan for us. Even if we can't see ourselves being the Chosen Ones, we need to remember that He has a purpose for everything He does."

This scene was my attempt to have them struggling with their new identity. But it never went beyond that, and you have to admit, this is a very weak conversation.

After supper, General Clive, an intelligent rebel, declared the news about the Chosen Ones. When the cheering and clapping diminished, Clive went on to say that the army was going to attack the Rachendax. Laying the plants on the table, he said in his Texas accent, "Alright, here's what we are going to do . . ."

*facepalms* Did I really, really have to specify that Clive was "an intelligent rebel"? Seriously, dude? I'm tempted to cuff younger me upside the head. For the record, it's a Texan accent, not a Texas accent.

As a full moon blazed into the sky, the attacking army left the safety of the garrison. They walked a fair distance before Clive ordered, "Time to separate to two groups. One of thirteen thousand, the other with seven thousand. Let's move, move, move!"

The two contingents went their ways. The larger one was meant to draw out the enemy forces while the smaller went a back way to place the bomb. At a signal, the bigger division would retreat as the bomb was the set and the others backed off. Should the bomb not wreck enough of the castle, the knights would come back and torch the place. Hopefully, their efforts would not be in vain.

I feel as though repeating words like "move" is a stereotypical military thing to do. Plus, if I'd actually had them talk about the plan instead of just dumping it here, it'd be a lot more interesting to read about.

A maraconda stood guard on the top of a tower. His eyes watched the sandy plains, and he occasionally licked his lips with a silvery blue tongue. His body was contorted and twisted, like a rag that was wrung out too much. But there was a contrast to his brown skin: his crystal clear head. A heart sent blood through invisible veins, and the brain rested not far from it.

While I'm genuinely intrigued by my design choice for the maraconda, this is a very clunky way of showing the reader what the race looks like.

Mark and David were in the first battle group. They strode side-by-side to the Rachendax. It was massive, its shape being half a stretched decagon. At each vertice stood a tower, and the back "wall" was a miniature mountain. On it, another tower, this one much taller and wider, rose proudly.

Again, I'm interested by the fortress's design, but the description feels awkward. It doesn't help matters that I forgot that "vertices" is the plural of "vertex."

As the fighters neared, maracondas raced along the walls to small catapults. David recalled from his studies that when a maraconda died, the heart disappeared. But the crafty creatures could play dead by shrinking their heart to a tiny size. Only a very careful observer would notice the micro-organ. So everyone would have to be cautious when assuming a maraconda had been killed.

What is this, a section of cool info written in a lame way? Three strikes and you're out, young me. Well, if that was the case, he'd--I mean, I'd--have been out long ago.

As Mark slid off the battlement to the wide wall's walkway, David ordered sharply, "Duck!" He obeyed, and a knife struck a maraconda, wearing the standard bronze breastplate and black ninja belt, behind Mark. The maraconda gasped and fell off.

Maybe I'm just nitpicking at this point, but this would've required some luck or good skills in a few ways. First, the maraconda would need to take a while in attempting to stab or hurt Mark in some fashion. Second, David would have missed spotting the enemy when he climbed up first. Third, Mark has to react to David fast enough, because I'm assuming that the latter is drawing a knife while he's giving the warning. Like I said, I might be digging too deep with this one, but still.

And please explain why a bricking ninja belt--a black one, no less--is standard-issue. That offers no protection for one's legs.

David set to getting rid of a catapult using his sword, and Mark guarded him with a nocked bow. Three arabon suddenly appeared, charging at the soldiers. Mark fired and watched the arrow go through one's heart and into the next's calf. The arabon screamed and spun around, slicing off the head of the third behind him. Another arrow slammed forcefully in his neck, causing him to collapse.

I'd really like to know what physical requirements are necessary for an arrow to pass through one body and enter another so that the second victim somehow turns fast enough, with a sword at the right angle, to behead the third dude behind him. Seems kinda iffy, but who am I to question it?

Correct me if I'm wrong, but shouldn't Mark get in a few rapid-fire shots rather than merely standing there and watching his arrows? If he misses, it gives the enemy (who have shown up out of the blue, even though this is on a tall castle wall) the opportunity to get close enough to kill him. I also feel like a sword isn't the best way to ruin a catapult . . . Speaking of which, is there no one manning it? Are they destroying it so that the baddies can't? It's not like the catapults are shooting themselves.

The Canadian came over to [David] and began to force the wheel to the left. The job wasn't as easy as it first looked, and their palms grew damp and clammy with sweat.

"Yikes," growled Mark. "I could do with some more exercise. This baby's tough and uncooperative." He glanced behind him. "You know, we're pretty exposed here, because we'd rather not stop and there is no protection for us."

"Except for Detrius," David uttered. "But don't worry, all the baddies are engaged in combat."

Guys, stop talking already! You're wasting your breath conversing when you should be focusing on getting the Rachendax's doors open. David's religious utterance felt forced, and he should know that by saying what he said, he's going to summon bad guys. (You're not allowed to say "baddies;" that's my thing.) Besides, don't you think that if enemy troops noticed that the doors were being opened, stopping Mark and David would become one of their top priorities? They should be rushed right now by a group of maraconda or something.

At his words, a group of maraconda appeared. Catching sigh of the humans, they used their defected legs to run awkwardly at them.

"Well, all except them," David said. "We have to open the gates before they get here."

"Already on that," Mark informed. The two put all their muscle behind the work, and the doors were opening, only at a slow pace. The maracondas neared quickly, raising their swords in anticipation for bloodshed.

What'd I tell ya? Realistically speaking, I think the two heroes should be dead at this point, but that'd ruin the story . . . maybe.

 David prayed, "Help us, Detrius. We need your strength." Mark added an amen.

Just as the maracondas were in front of the gates, it was like Revier's legnas had given a mighty push. The doors slammed into the walls beside them, and the battering rams, in mid-swing, careened into the Ghrumet creatures, sending them soaring through the air until their bodies smashed upon the ground.

"If this was a bowling game," Mark remarked, "I think the guys operating the battering rams got a strike."

More faith stuff that feels a little inorganic combined with brutal death and comedic jokes made about said death. This story in a nutshell, basically. Wait, why did I use "remark" as a speaker tag for Mark?

David chuckled and watched the rebel and Follower knights pour inside the Rachendax. Some went through the entrance, and some used the siege towers. And as everyone came into the open space, he also espied no other resistance. Then it clicked. "It's a trap!" he cried.

His warning was too late. Multiple doors to barracks in the mountain, letting maracondas and arabons swarm out. They formed a massive ring around the humans. Commander Ryle of the arabon unsheathed his scimitar and yelled, "Kill them all!"

The foes closed in.

And annihilated everybody. The end.

How convenient that not a single knight notices that the enemy has disappeared, and they all show up the instant David recognizes that it's a Star Wars reference. (Seriously, how can you not hear that line in Admiral Ackbar's voice?) You may have also noticed that I never specified what the barracks' doors did, only that creatures poured out. I seem to have forgotten or messed up a lot of words in this particular chapter.

source; a relevant picture that breaks up the text (you're welcome)

General Clive's sidekick Ethan led the smaller group around the back of the mountain. Large rocks lay in various places against the cliff. Ethan went to the biggest one and ordered several of the troops to roll the boulder, Warren being part of the selected. He went to the rock and pushed hard. Soon, a tunnel was revealed and the knights entered.

Sidekick? How about a military term like lieutenant or something? Give me a break. And man, that Dwayne Johnson. Always blocking the entrance to secret tunnels in evil lairs that the good guys probably shouldn't even know about.

The hallways were dark, and Warren felt they were quite confusing. But he knew they were going up, which was their purpose.

I . . . I just . . . I have no words, except that we can all really sense what Warren must be feeling in this difficult time.

Warren sniffed the air. "What is that smell?"

"Incense," Ethan growled. "This is a place of worship for Lurkum. They believe he's some god who is going to bring down Detrius." He snorted, then muttered an obscenity. "Where are the guards?"

Well, if this story's done one thing, it's made me look up what incense smells like on Google, because I'm curi--no, don't say that, Ethan! You'll--

As if like an answer, two maracondas approached them from shadows. Almost all maracondas were only five feet, but these were seven feet. Spindly limbs were replaced with thick ones. They wore a silver breastplate and balaclava with a red belt. By the way one held his halberd and the other a scythe, Warren assumed they were elite fighters.

--summon more enemies. When will people learn? I'd also like to just remind everyone that the Rachendax is in Ghrumet, which is the desert continent. So there is absolutely no need to wear a balaclava, not unless it gets super cold at night.

The first one chopped a solider in half and pierced another. Both Warren and Ethan made a swing at him, but the maraconda blocked with the halberd's staff. He stabbed at the two, and Warren jumped back while Ethan met the attack. The man nodded quickly towards the maraconda with the scythe, indicating that Warren needed to get him.

Yup, the violence is going to start picking up again from here on. You've been warned.

The assassin had already cleaved six knights, and Warren wasn't going to let him add more to his tally. He lunged at the maraconda, who parried at the last possible moment. The guard growled and whipped his scythe around at stomach level. Warren propelled himself backward, trying to avoid the weapon. The blade still sliced through a weak spot in the armor and cut open some of Warren's skin. The Chosen One felt blood soak into his tunic instantly. There was another swing, one Warren dodged, before he responded with a hack of his sword at the fighter's hand. The maraconda pulled back, but his thumb plunked on the ground, the scythe following. The guard made a fist, and long knives protruded from devices that were attached to leather wrist armor.

Dang, that was a long paragraph. I could've easily made that two, or maybe even three. But why are my main characters obsessed with cutting off bad guys' fingers? It's a weird thing to do. And don't get me started on calling Warren the Chosen One for one sentence there.

The creature batted his claws at his opponent and Warren moved away. He tried again, and again Warren eluded the movement. Now he was frustrated, so he began a series of attacks that an average person couldn't escape from. Unfortunately for the maraconda, Warren didn't fit the description.

Warren had put his sword away and, just as the guard finished a desperate slash, grapped the thing's arms and hurled him up mightily. The assassin hit the monument of Lurkum, and a pop rang as his spine dislocated. The maraconda wheezed and tumbled off, landing in one of the pots. A sickly odor of burning flesh and incense arose around the sanctuary. Warren crinkled his nose and thought, "Maraconda flambé is definitely not on my menu."

Oh, gosh, where to begin? Well, how about that awful paragraph that could've been so cool, but was instead so lame? I could think of so many ways to make that fight between the elite maraconda and Warren much more interesting (and believable--why aren't the other soldiers attacking too?). Then I totally misspell "grabbed," and throw in a bit of spinal injuries and burns for good measure. Someone needs to take thirteen-year-old me to a psychologist or something!

He turned in time to witness Ethan run through the remaining guard with his sword. The assassin crumpled, causing Ethan to rotate toward his men and pumped his fist. The knights cheered and clapped quietly for their commander's victory. But the maraconda had only pretended to be killed, and now, unseen by all except Warren, raised his halberd for the death blow. Warren noticed, however, and withdrew his hammer before pitching it at the creature. The hammer crashed heavily into the side of it's target's head. He gave a dying scream as the glass shattered and blood rushed from his open veins.

To quote Markiplier, "I have so many questions!" Do these people actually know about fist pumping? Why does Ethan change from present to past tense? Why are all the soldiers seemingly blind and the main characters not when it comes to noticing enemies or the lack thereof? Aren't halberds long enough that you'd see one moving? Why did I use "it's" instead of "its"? As for the death, that was somehow both really disgusting and really cool at the same time.

For the sake of moving the post along, I won't include everything that happens next. But just so you know what's going on, Ethan apologized for getting cocky (I think the knights should apologize for being lazy). Ethan comments on how it'll be ironic that the idol of Lurkum will be one of the first things to blow up--pretty sure he doesn't know what ironic means--and lights the bomb, then everyone runs out.

A sense of being lost washed through Warren again as they treaded the labyrinth of passageways. "This is random . . . but what does the word . . . Rachendax mean?" Warren asked Ethan.

"It means maze," the man panted. "Some claim . . . one can 'move' the walls . . . to block the entry of . . . various halls."

They were lagging behind a little when, all of a sudden, a thick wall slammed down from the roof, preventing them to continue that way.

When will you guys learn? Stop talking to save your breath for action! I bet if they'd ran without having that conversation, they would've still been with the rest of the group. This story is so very illogical sometimes. Not to mention its terrible grammar and spelling that poke up on a regular basis.

Before Ethan replied, a massive silhouette appeared in front of them and grabbed him, freezing Warren with his frightful orange eyes. Using his free hand, Leviathan clawed his way in Ethan's chest. He ripped out the general's assistant's heart. Ethan trembled, and then folded over, a victim of the dragon. Leviathan plopped the heart in his mouth and crunched down on it, sending a splat of blood across Warren's face. "Mmm," he mumbled, red saliva splashing down his jaw. "Still warm.

Okay, that is . . . vile, and gross, and completely unnecessary. Seriously, I'm getting uncomfortable just writing that out again. I swear, the nastiest deaths in this story have to do with hearts. *remembers Ssen's death* Or throats.

Why'd I call Ethan an assistant this time? I thought he was a sidekick. Whatever the case, at least he's dead now. There are far too many insignificant, boring secondary characters to keep track of. (To fill you in again, Warren gags and cries about what just unfolded. Leviathan, disgusted, knocks him out. Bye-bye, Warren. It was nice knowing ya.)

Meanwhile, Baron Narris of the maraconda strode down the stairs where he had stood when the fight occurred. Lifting the bomb, he said to himself, "I think it will be very ironic when, in an attempt to crush Lurkum, the rebels will crush themselves."

He went back up the flight of stairsteps that led to his chambers and let the fuse almost disappear. He peered out a wide window, saw where the most of the human army was, and chucked the weapon out.

Now that's what irony is, Ethan. Take note in the afterlife. Also, "the most of the human army"? What're we, five? How did I ever think that was proper grammar?

Also also, I just realized a huge inconsistency while reading this. *takes a deep breath* Why the actual brick are the rebels attacking Lurkum now if they let his army march through their port city earlier in the story? MAKE UP YOUR EVER-LOVING MINDS, PEOPLE! Who is your enemy: the Followers or Lurkum and his hooligans? And if they were forced to let the opposing army dock in their city and head for Malanthiv from there, we were never told, or given the slightest indication that was the case. For all the readers know, the rebels are just a bunch of jerkfaces. This frustrates me like you wouldn't believe. *smacks younger me upside the head* Get your act together, man.

The sealing noose of enemies suddenly dispersed. "Huh?" said Mark. "What is going on?"

There was a plunk, and Clive shouted, "Fire in the hole!" Everyone scattered away from the bomb, only it was too late. A thunderous explosion rippled in the air, smoke dancing to the sky. Mark glimpsed fellow knights being incinerated instantly, others falling to the sand and having their life drain right for their eyes to see.

Here we have Mark at the peak of his intelligence. Again, would they know about the "fire in the hole" expression, especially since it originated with miners? And if this bomb was supposed to bring down a fortress, you'd think everyone--bad guys included--would be dead right about now. (The scene continues with Clive and Taylor, who seems to have randomly shown up just so I can use him again, telling Mark and David that they need to leave for Zracs immediately.)

"And what about Warren?" asked David.

Flapping reached their ears, and Leviathan's shadow covered them. "If you want your friend," he taunted, "you'll have to get him yourself." Chuckling menacingly, he soared off, hefting Warren.

Why is Leviathan capturing Warren? He doesn't know that Warren's a Chosen One, so there's really no need to keep him alive. I double-checked, and there was never any sign that Ian or Alex found out about the three Earthlings being the ones in the prophecy. As far as the enemy is concerned, the Chosen Ones are still Reuben, Lance, and Xander. The icing on the cake is Leviathan's cliché dialogue and cheesy laughing as he flies off.

"Yes, sir." [Taylor, Mark, and David] ran toward some available horses, and, after mounting them, began the ride to the fort. While his steed galloped onward, Mark turned to the Rachendex, taking in the brave men who might be sacrificing their lives for him. Water choked his eyes, and his throat caught. Mark set his gaze ahead.

He never looked back again.

I'm getting some Prince Caspian movie vibes from this. Oh, and that water choking your eyes, Mark? Those are tears. (One more summary of what happens next: Clive tarries until the trio is further away before giving the call for a retreat. His cry is heard through the well in the secret tunnel, and those guys all leave too.)

Maraconda and arabon jeered at the receding army. "Should we give chase?" one questioned Ryl.

Ryl shook his head. "They've lost, and they know it. That's good enough."

As the sun set, one might notice that more red than green blood stained the ground. And in that blood rested ashes.

But if you pursue them, you could potentially kill more and earn brownie points with Leviathan. He'll roast you if you don't do a good job, and I don't mean the insulting kind of roast. I used to think that ending paragraph was cool and kind of poetic, but now it's just like, "Okay, sure, people I didn't care about died. Whoop-dee-doo."

And that's finally it! I'm sorry that this turned into such a monstrous post. Though I'm 75% certain you won't mind, since this is ending soon. What'd you think? Did you get your fill of laughs and sarcasm? I'm sure we all got more than our fair share of graphic character deaths.

The Get to Know Me Tag (Writer's Edition)

In the year that my blog has been around, I've done four tags. Today seems like a good day for a fifth. Christine tagged me about a month ago, and it looks like a really fun one! I'm excited to do it, so let's not wait a moment more. (And I'm not all that great at intros, either.)

As with all tags, there is protocol to follow. I must:

• Link back to the person who created the tag (Savannah).
• Thank the person who tagged you. Thanks, Christine, for sharing this with me!
• Share the tag graphic (which is optional, but I did it anyway because why not?).
• Tag eleven bloggers.

Now for the fun stuff!

Vital Stats and Appearance

Name: Billy Bob Jimmy Joe the Hillbilly Hobo (c'mon, don't tell me you guys thought that Josiah Dyck was my actual name)

Nicknames: Joe is a common one for me. People also call me Josh on a regular basis, even though I've never been one. They probably don't catch the ia there. When I was younger, Chloe called me Siah because she couldn't say my name properly. When I worked as a pump attendant, a number of my coworkers took to calling me Josie. One of the cashiers (probably the sweetest of the bunch) gave me the nickname J-dog. (Unless she meant dawg . . . I never asked for a specification.) Then I've got my various online aliases: Brickman, Fuzzy Boy, SwiftScarabAvenger, Dreadwisp, Morbus, Papyrus . . . you get the idea. (Feel free to call me virtually any of these, if you feel so led.)

Birthday: "December 16th, 1991." Gotta love the Civil War reference, am I right? Especially since my birthday is actually December 1st. The year shall remain a secret for now.

Hair Color and Length: My hair is dirty blonde, as disgusting as that may sound. It's darkened over time, according to my mom. And the length is . . . short, but not like a buzzcut. It's long enough to be cool and stylish, but short enough that it's generally not a hassle.

Eye Color: Gray-blue--which, in my mind, is a cool shade. Maybe I'm biased.

Braces/Piercings/Tattoos: My teeth are straight, so there's no need for braces. And I'm not the kind of guy who wants either piercings or tattoos, so this category is a big, fat "no" all-around.

Righty or Lefty: I'm right-handed, because that's only right.

Ethnicity: Not really sure, to be honest. I asked my parents about this one, and they guessed we have some ancestors who came from Holland, but other than that, I really have no idea. Maybe my family line came from outer space.

Firsts

First Novel Written: That would be the unnamed first installment in The Portal Chronicles trilogy. You know, the one I mock once a month? As I'm sure you all know, it's pretty awful. One might even venture to say it was absolutely terrible. I certainly wouldn't disagree. But considering that it was over 150 pages, and about 20-odd chapters . . . that's really not a bad start. You also have to factor in that I used to hate most writing prior to this. Seeing Tracey write inspired me, and this was what came out of that inspiration. Looking back, I've come a long way. But I will never say writing that novel was a waste of time. It was my humble beginning.

First Novel Completed: The award for that goes to The Attack on Gotham, a Marvel/DC crossover that was slightly better than the above story. I wrote it on the LEGO Message Boards, back when it was around. I'd only been on the MBs for about a month when I decided to, out of the blue, start writing something. I got a few readers and continued the story. It ended up being 50 (short) chapters over the span of 69 pages (33k words). Technically, this would be a novella, not a novel, but it felt like a novel to me back when I wrote it. I'd hoped to make it a trilogy, with me starting to work on the sequel, The Metropolis Siege. I eventually lost interest and never continued.

Award for Writing: I've gotten two of these. The first was when I won second place in a local Christmas story writing contest for the newspaper. I wrote about soldiers in WWII, and it was both the first and last time I entered the contest. I think I won $75 dollars for it or something.

The second was the Write Like a Ninja contest that was held by LEGO and Scholastic. There would be two grand prize winners and eight runners-up; the top two would be published in a book along with an official Ninjago story. The limit was 4,000 characters, which was very small. You could enter as many times as you wanted, so I wrote four stories. Out of close to a thousand entries, one of mine was chosen to be a runner-up. I was interviewed on the MBs and won a prize worth about $67 USD. It was one copy of the book, another book, and a Ninjago set (Ronin R.E.X., for anyone who's interested). In my mind, this was not only the better contest, but the better prize.

source

First Publication: When I won the Christmas story contest, my entry was published in the newspaper. That's basically the only time I've been published.

Conference: Well, I'd been hoping to go to Realm Makers this year, but due to my car loan, it was financially wiser to stay home. So no, I haven't been to one. Maybe next year? *crosses fingers*

Query/Pitch: Nope. Haven't done that yet. But something funny to do would be to take a baseball glove and throw your story at an agent. That way, you're literally pitching it.

Favorites

Novel (that you wrote): Let me ask you something. Would you ask a parent which child was their favorite? No, you wouldn't, because they can't properly answer that. Likewise, I don't have a favorite novel that I've written. I haven't even written that many novels. Most of the my stories are either incomplete or are too short to be considered novels. I love each and every one of my brainchildren in different ways, so I have no real answer for this.

Genre: Probably fantasy, or stories with fantastical elements. I mean, the first two series and the one standalone book I want to publish first are all fantasy. Well, the standalone is a pirate story, but it's got stuff that makes it kinda fantasy-ish. Seeing as it's my favorite genre to read, it makes sense.

Author: One does simply choose one favorite author. I have many, like Bryan Davis, Andrew Klavan, Anne Elisabeth Stengl, John Flanagan, and Eoin Colfer. I'd probably even add some of my friends to that list, such as Preston, Megan, John, Tracey, Christine . . . Yeah, I'd better stop now.

Writing Music: This isn't even a question. Anyone who knows me knows I love soundtracks more than any kind other type of music. Doesn't matter if it's for a movie, game, or TV show; heck, it could even just be an indie album! For example, I love a lot of Hans Zimmer's work, especially for Pirates of the Caribbean and The Dark Knight trilogy. Kirby games always have stellar music, especially the newer installments. Almost every Zelda game has phenomenal music; the same goes for the Mario & Luigi series (in case you didn't know, Yoko Shimomura, who composed the music for all the Kingdom Hearts games, created the score for every M&L title). Blake Neely has excelled at his Arrowverse soundtracks. Again, I have to stop before I get too carried away.

Time to Write: Hard to say. I haven't done it in so long . . . *coughs in embarrassment* I remember saying at one point that the evening was my favorite time to write. I don't really know if I have a favorite now. Just give me my soundtrack and a walk outside to contemplate my stories/daydream, and I can probably write at any time. I've also found that cool, cloudy, or rainy/snowy weather really gets me in the writing mood.

Writing Snack/Drink: A cup of ice-cold water is really all I need. Maybe a candy every now and then for brain food. Other than that, I'm good most of the time.

Movie: Again, I don't know how anyone can have one favorite movie. That's just not possible for me. I love the Marvel Cinematic Universe, Pirates of the Caribbean, Lord of the Rings, all three LEGO movies, The Flash TV show (I watch it on DVD, so I'm counting it as a movie), the Ninjago: Masters of Spinjitzu show, the Maze Runner trilogy, almost every Pixar film, etc. You ain't gonna make me pick one.

Writing Memory: You're kidding, right? I've been writing for about eight years now, and I'm supposed to pick one? Aw, heck, no! Some of my favorite memories are being one of the runners-up for the Write Like a Ninja contest; sharing my stories on the MBs and getting instant feedback on them; reading my fairy tale retellings out loud on a voice chat with Preston and Megan; and just that feeling when you're filled with determination inspiration and a strong desire to write for hours.

One of my most distinct memories that instantly comes to mind is when I was taking a walk on a cool, overcast day a few years ago. I was brainstorming Darkened Slumber, my Sleeping Beauty retelling, and I suddenly had the idea that a certain character should be killed by another certain character. I knew it would be one of the most emotional scenes in the story, and I wasn't wrong. But I kept it, because it's fun to toy with readers like that sometimes. I had other reasons too, of course. I'm not crazy, what're you talking about?

Childhood Book: There were a few, and I know I've mentioned this elsewhere, but I think one of my top favorites was I'd Choose You by John Trent. Spoke to me then, speaks to me now. I sometimes struggle with feeling valuable and important, and the whole message of the book was that there's always someone who would choose you.

Currently

Reading: Slaves of Socorro by John Flanagan, which is taking me far longer to read than it should. I usually fly through his books.

Writing: I'm currently working on my Ninjago fanfiction called The Tournament of Elements. I'm rereading it so I refresh my memory--while also making corrections along the way--and then I'll finish it. As a fun side project that's basically just for when I'm out and about, I'm writing a novelization of Undertale, which I'm calling Beneath the Surface, on my phone.

Listening To: I've got my entire soundtrack library on shuffle right now, but the current song is "Back in Venice" from the Assassin's Creed II soundtrack by Jesper Kyd. I love this album's use of acoustic guitars!

Watching: Just watched an episode of The Flash and Masters of Spinjitzu today. I'm about halfway through S1 of The Flash, which is definitely picking up the pace in the plot and reminding me why I love the show so much. As for Ninjago, I've got two episodes left in the Possession season; then it's on to Skybound, which I've only watched once, and it was a long time ago.

Learning: If I actually want to be an author, I need to take my writing seriously. That means putting more time and effort into it every week. It may be hard at first, especially when I'm juggling everything that I both want and have to do. Scratch that--it's going to be hard a lot of the time, no doubt. But some of the best things in life take work, and I'd rather fail having tried then to have never made an attempt.

Future

Want to be Published: Yes, yes, yes! I cannot say yes enough times. I've got stories to share with the world, and I truly believe it's what God wants me to do. So getting published is on the agenda.

Indie or Traditional: Most likely traditional. Maybe when I have enough followers, finances, and resources (which includes knowing the right people), I could try published independently. Until then, I think I'll need some help in the writing world.

Wildest Goal: I want to publish many books, go on world tours, meet a lot of people, get to see movies and games made from my novels, and so forth. It sounds crazy, I know. but God says He "can do so many awe-inspiring, immeasurable things, things greater than we ever could ask or imagine through the power at work in us . . ." (Ephesians 3:20, The Voice). So I'll keep dreaming big.

And now it's time to tag other people! Which I'm always horrible at, because I don't want to tag someone who has already done this. So I shall tag . . .

Brianna Stacyn @ No End of Books
Plus ten other bloggers who want to do this

Did you have as much fun reading this as I did writing this? Did you learn stuff about me, or even stuff about yourself through me (which would be pretty darn awesome)? Any tips you could give on how to stay dedicated to writing?

Summer Hype Music /// Music Monday #28

It's summer, which means it's time for fun, upbeat tunes that you can crank while cruising around town. Are you ready for this? You're about to get your socks knocked off! . . . And if you're wearing socks and sandals, then you deserve to have them knocked off. Because that's just bad fashion sense.

"Phoenix" from the album Rise

Composed by MDK

I'd have to say this is one of my favorite MDK songs, Maybe it's because it has a cool orchestral-ish intro that always brings to mind the image of a desert. Maybe it's the hardcore electric guitar and dubstep that follows. Heck, it could even be the build-up! (It's probably all of the above and more.)

A lot of the time, I don't care for electronic or dubstep music, because it can be annoying or repetitive or just really uncreative. MDK is an exception for me. When I listen to his music while I'm driving, I turn it up loud and roll the windows down. To do otherwise almost feels like a crime.

He's got a lot of cool, finger-tapping beats. I wouldn't necessarily recommend all of his songs, due to the fact that some of them have random harsh swear words, such as the f-bomb. You get rest assured that anything I share on my blog will be safe, and if there would for some reason ever be any swear word in any song I feature, I'd let you know. Also, if you want to listen to his music on your own, feel free to ask me about which ones are clean and which aren't.

Changing gears a bit, I need to fill you guys in on something. Whenever I sit down to write one of these, I always think to myself, "Oh, I should pick that song! But there's that one too. I can't forget about that one either." Truth be told, I could probably do a Music Monday post every week and wouldn't run out of ideas. Ever.

So I want you to answer this question: what kind of music do you want to hear more of? Do you want more movie soundtracks? More video game music? More lyrical songs? I'd like to mention that I've always considered the point of these posts to be exposing you to music you may not listen to normally, or know of at all. Feel free to give any suggestions in the comments.

What'd you think of the song? Did it fill you with summer hype? You feel like a phoenix now, ready to take on the world? If not, listen to the music on repeat until you do.

Sophie Quire and Half Moon Investigations /// A Double Book Review

A little over a year ago, I reviewed the whimsical tale of Peter Nimble and His Fantastic Eyes. Since then, I haven't done another book review. But today is the day that I remedy the situation. I'll be showcasing not one, but two stories. I shall try to avoid spoilers, and any that I must give will have a disclaimer. Let's do this!

Also, I apologize for the lateness of this post. It just took longer than I thought it would, which is kind why I slightly rushed the second review. Sorry about that.

We shall start with the review for Sophie Quire and the Last Storyguard!

Plot

Twelve-year-old Sophie Quire is at odds with the people in her town. Bustleburgh has decided they shall be rid of all nonsense--and that includes all fiction. They are rounding up all novels and creating the Pyre of Progress, which shall be lit in a short while. Sophie is having none of that. Her father is the owner of a bookstore, and as the bookmender of said store, she understands the magic of stories.

Her talents don't go unnoticed, and the blind thief, Peter Nimble, and his companion--the man-cat-horse known as Sir Tode--show up on her doorstep. They've brought a book with them that needs to be repaired, and it is anything but ordinary. The Book of Who is a thing of magic and nonsense, one that answers to your "who" questions by flipping to the correct entry.

Caught up in something bigger than herself, Sophie must join forces with Peter and Tode as they search for the other three books, which are What, Where, and When. Villainous folk lurk, and they would love to get their hands on the power contained within the books' pages. To save the world, Sophie will have to become . . .

The last Storyguard.

Pros

Oh, where do I start? I think the beginning is a very good place, because with the first paragraph, I was reminded just how much I loved Jonathan Auxier's writing style. Allow me to share it with you:

It has often been said that one should never judge a book by its cover. As any serious reader can tell you, this is terrible advice. Serious readers know the singular pleasure of handling a well-made book--the heft and texture of the case, the rasp of the spine as you lift the cover, the sweet, dusty aroma of yellowed pages as they pass between your fingers. A book is more than a vessel for ideas: It is a living thing in need of love, warmth, and protection.

In fact, I firmly believe that Auxier's voice is one of the reasons both Peter Nimble and Sophie Quire were so enjoyable. Take away his whimsical way of writing, and you take away one of the stories' key ingredients. A writing style is like the wheels of a car: if they're flat, no matter how good that car looks, it isn't going anywhere. I think he definitely nailed his own unique approach to a novel.

Something he's also succeeded at is his worldbuilding. While the setting of Peter Nimble was the mixture of clockwork machinery and fairy tale castles, this one has a very different flair to it. I wouldn't know how to describe it, but I very much enjoyed the backdrop he created. It fit the overall story quite nicely. One might say it resembled that of a classic fantasy adventure, but not in a bad way.

I'd like to point out--and appreciate--the fact that some of my cons from the previous book are now pros. A big issue for me was that some characters had felt a little flat and could've used some rounding out. If they had been given more oomph, the story would've come alive that much more. This time around, that was a non-issue. The main characters were teeming with more life than they had in the first book, and no side character was uninteresting. Considering that Auxier has only written one novel between the two Peter Nimble books, he's come a long way.

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I also mentioned that there were times when Peter suddenly felt something, liked tiredness or hunger, with no build-up to be found. Not a trace of that problem remained in Sophie Quire. It seems Auxier has learned from his mistakes, a much-needed quality in a writer.

I loved the plot. Just as the first book turned the orphan saga trope on its head, this title did the same for the chosen one trope. I was never once bored by the story, nor felt that any part of it was shoddy. I couldn't put it down for long; it got me hooked and didn't lose me at any point in the story. But what I really want to touch on is the theme of the story, which is both strangely profound and vastly different from anything I'd ever read. So, just in case . . . POTENTIAL SPOILER ALERT!

Auxier's message is that books are magic. When we lose that magic--that "nonsense"--our world becomes bleaker. There's one scene where Sophie peers into another world, where children are doing school. They'd lost their stories of wonderment and imagination, and now they're dreary from all the boring information they have to read.

That's what Auxier hits so perfectly. He inspires you to go read other books and renew that sense of awe. For a writer like myself, by the end of the story, I felt a strong desire to go out and contribute to that magic as well. I can't recall the last novel I've read that has ever had this effect on me.

He also disabuses the notion of escapism, which I've never appreciated or cared for. He demonstrates this perfectly in one conversation:

"I don't understand," Peter said. "How can burning a bunch of books hurt things in the real world?"

"The real world," Professor Cake repeated with a tone of notable contempt. "The very notion is absurd. Worlds and everything in them are made real by the stories that inhabit them."

I totally agree. Books can give us hope for brighter days, help us to see something from a different perspective, or just find some simple enjoyment. It's interesting to note that Auxier also proves this in the story's finale (ACTUAL SPOILER ALERT!): when a monster is unleashed to destroy all nonsense, the first thing it does is to gobble up the villain who brought it forth, then head right for Bustleburgh, as if they're the ones who are full of nonsense. ALL SPOILER ALERTS OVER!

I could go on and on about this story, but I still have to do the cons and another novel, so I better get in gear.

Cons

As is often the case with middle grade stories, twelve-year-olds do far more than they technically would. Both Peter and Sophie are this age, and they put their lives on the line a lot. However, because I enjoyed this book so much, it's something I can easily overlook.

Now, I have to ask, how much have middle grade books evolved since I was last part of the target audience? There are things I wouldn't have imagined back in the day. For starters, there's one use of "d--n," though said character is reprimanded. (I can't recall if there were a couple uses of "bloody" or not.)

Violence-wise, it happened less often than it did in Peter Nimble, though it was still the same level. Again, I don't remember all the instances of violence, but here are a few that stuck out to me: a character is gobbled up by a monster and suffers a most painful death; someone is shot in the throat; someone's hand gets chopped (off-screen); a man is eaten by wild animals; stuff like that.

But the biggest concern of this story is more of a . . . sensual matter. A woman gives Sophie a dress that bares her neck and shoulders (because her original clothes were torn in a "disadvantageous" way), but Sophie isn't comfortable with that. The woman tells her:

"A walled garden must have a lattice gate. Before a woman can be desired, she must reveal a bit of what makes her desirable."

Said female character later does things like slit her dress up to her thigh to garner pity and . . . male attention, I suppose. Now, if this was a YA novel, I would say it's a very clean one; I wouldn't really bothered by it. But because it's in the juvenile section of my library, then I feel weird about it being in here.

Conclusion

If someone were to ask me what my favorite book of the year was, it'd be a toss-up between Moonblood and this one. Sophie Quire was an immensely enjoyable read. Aside from my opinion that it should be labelled a YA story, I enjoyed everything this book had to offer.

Sophie Quire and the Last Storyguard is one of those rare books that refuses to be pushed back by those who claim we read only to escape reality. Auxier believes stories are magical things that need to be loved and cared for, and he weaves a gripping tale that makes you want to go out and just read as many novels as possible. Too often, we abandon childlike wonder and hope when we age, but this story is a call for us to come back to that.

To conclude, Auxier included a quote at the beginning by Scottish author Kenneth Grahame, who said, "The most priceless possession of the human race is the wonder of the world. Yet, latterly, the utmost endeavours of mankind have been directed towards the dissipation of that wonder . . . Nobody, any longer, may hope to entertain an angel unawares, or to meet Sir Lancelot in shining armour on a moonlit road. But what is the use of living in a world devoid of wonderment?" Auxier absolutely nails this message, tucked away in a delightful, imaginative read.

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I give it five out of five stars!

Now, here's the review for Half Moon Investigations!

Plot

Twelve-year-old Fletcher Moon is a detective who's seen it all. That's what he thought, anyway, until he gets a new case that is unlike anything he's dealt with in the past.

It all started with him proving that Herod Sharkey stole an organizer at school, and when Fletcher reveals that Herod is indeed the culprit, Red Sharkey doesn't like it. Fletcher's prized badge disappears, and he knows that the Sharkeys--the town's biggest criminal family--are behind it.

But in trying to get it back, he becomes involved in a new case . . . one in which he is framed for the crime. He has to clear his name, but time is running out fast.

And the criminal is still out there, waiting for another opportunity to strike.

Pros

As I mentioned in my last Monthly HapPENings post, I love me a funny detective story. My love for this sub-genre started when I read Sherlock Johny's Case Files on the MBs. Here, I even got the author's permission to share an excerpt. I wanted to include the whole scene, but it'd probably end up being longer than the actual review.

As soon as we entered the first floor, we were met with AP's voice.  "What will the Moderators do next? NOTHING! As usual. I'm AwesomePythor for MBN. We'll be back! Right after these commercial messages." The TV above MKM's desk cut to commercials.

"AP's so annoying," Darthy said. "And weird. He's like, addicted to chocolate milk."

"Addicted?" I asked.

"Yeah," Darthy said.  He lowered his voice.  "I heard he can't go without a bottle of chocolate milk a day."

"That's crazy talk," I said, turning for the door.

"No it's not, look," Darthy said, grabbing my shoulder and pointing at the TV.  A giant glass bottle full of brown liquid had just appeared.

"What's that?" I asked.  5 seconds later, I wished I hadn't.  Out of the screen belted the most obnoxious voice I've ever heard.

"Coco Sippies taste so good!

You should drink them, yes you should!"

On the screen a user suddenly grabbed the bottle and started chugging it.  It took me a moment to realize the user was AwesomePythor.

"When you're grumpy, when you're sad!

Coco Sippies make you glad!"

That story is where my love for comical mystery began, and if you enjoy that too, this is the perfect story for you. I really appreciate Eoin Colfer's sense of humor, and he succeeded at it in this story. But it's not all fun and games. The plot has some very interesting twists and turns, and even had a reveal in the end that I didn't see coming (but is apparently a trope used in old detective shows).

No one can ever say that Colfer creates boring characters. Well, The Supernaturalist might be an exception, but for the most part, they are all unique, and very much so. While there isn't necessarily a lot of emotional connection to the characters, by no means does that entail a disinterest in them. I very much wanted to find how whodunnit (see what I did there?). What's very clever is how Colfer made things seem really grand and conspiratorial, when in reality the whole thing was on a lower scale than Fletcher might be willing to admit.

I think those are probably the biggest pros of the whole thing: the spot-on humor, the intriguing plot, and the characters who tie them both together.

Cons

Very few. There's the occasional use of "oh my God." Fletcher finds himself in perilous situations, but there really isn't any strong violence (the one thing that really sticks out to me is Fletcher being struck forcefully by a bat). He also has to escape the police and break into one place, but that kinda comes part and parcel with the genre. Someone uses his computer to illegally download music. It's just little stuff that I mention just so people are aware, not because I'm actually offended by it.

Conclusion

After reading The Supernaturalist, I was hesitant to read another one of Colfer's stand-alone books. Half Moon Investigations seemed the most promising, but would it hold up to the awesomeness that is the Artemis Fowl series?

In short: yes. It was very different from that series, but it was very good. Would I say it was as good as Sophie Quire? No, because that book left me inspired and gave me food for thought. This was just a fun, fast-passed read, and it's most certainly worth your time. (I don't want to give the impression that I don't like the story. I just have less to say about it, and I want to get this post up.) I really hope it gets a sequel, seeing as it even got a small TV show.

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I also hope that other authors pick up on the whole comedy mystery idea. We could use some more of those types of tales.

I give it four out of five stars!

So what're your thoughts on my double review? Would you read either one of these books? Which looks more appealing, and why? Should I do more book reviews in the future?

Monthly HapPENings: June

Guess what, everybody? We're halfway through the year! I'd dance with happiness, except I'm not happy that 2018 is half over. It felt like it just started! (I know, I say that all the time, but it doesn't make it any less true.) I've discovered that the older I get, the faster time seems to fly by. Kinda weird how it works, right?

June was a busy, busy month for me. For starters, Chloe graduated high school, and I had the privilege of being her emcee. While I personally felt that I was a little rough in my public speaking skills, I was only complimented by others for a job well-done. So perhaps I was my own worst critic. Preparing my notes and just the thought of the grad made me feel busier than it should've.

I also filmed my blogoversary vlog, answering all 71 questions that were submitted, which took a couple hours to shoot. When I tried uploading the videos onto my computer, I was worried for a while, because I encountered some issues. Thankfully, I was able to work my way around the finicky relationship between my phone and my laptop. Then I had to edit and upload those suckers before writing posts for all of them (believe it or not, penning those ten posts took around two hours). That ate up two weeks of June.

Finally, in the last week, my family took a vacation together. You probably didn't even notice that I was gone, considering how I had posts scheduled for every day. It was a much-needed breather, and I really enjoyed it. It differed from our previous vacations in the fact that we did a minimum amount of shopping, and also only a little swimming at the beach. It was more of a relaxing time to watch movies, read books, play games (electronic and Phase 10, to be precise) . . . stuff like that. We just hung out.

One of my highlights in every vacation is when we have a campfire on one evening and say something we appreciate about each family member. We've never had a time where no tears were shed, and it's moments like those where you really grasp the value of a strong family. This tradition is definitely one I'm going to pass on to my own family in the future.

Bookish HapPENings

Wonder of wonders, I actually read four books this month! All of which were on my holiday, because I didn't have (or make) much time for reading before that, since the vlog was my priority. Even better was the fact that the three of the four were really good! So which stories did I read?

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I'd picked this book up at a local book fair a while back, because it seemed interesting enough. But it was only a decent story. The plot is that the main character, eleven-year-old Alex has a life-threatening sickness (one that doctors conveniently can't figure out so that it can do whatever the author needs it to). In fact, he dies from it. But his mother, an Egyptologist, uses the Lost Spells from the Book of the Dead to bring her son back from the afterlife--and in doing so, she unleashes five Death Walkers and mysteriously vanishes, along with the spells. Now Alex and his best friend, Ren, need to find her and stop the Walkers at all costs.

I'll probably continue the series to see how it ends, but there's no other reason for me to finish. No emotional connection, witty dialogue, or captivating voice. Just a storyline that's barely interesting enough to keep me hooked. I'm also one of those readers who, once they've started a series that's only okay, needs to finish just for closure's sake.

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I'm gonna wait to give my full thoughts on this book until next week, when I properly review it. Suffice it to say that if someone were to ask me what the best book I've read this year was, I'd say it's a toss-up between Moonblood and this one. I loved it to bits, and I'm looking forward to sharing it with you guys!

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I'm getting close to finishing this series, and it's been an interesting one. I enjoyed the new stakes and challenges the book added to the overall plot; it also finished very differently from any of the other installments. I'll definitely be picking up the final book very soon.

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This another novel where I want to share my full thoughts in a review. Suffice it to say I wholeheartedly enjoyed this book. I've got a hankering for more comical detective stories, and this one fit the bill. I adored it from the first sentence. It's one of my favorite Eoin Colfer books to date.

HapPENings on the Screen

My sisters and I have been progressing through S4 of Once at a very slow pace, but it's pretty good so far. I am, however, finding the villainess extremely annoying, as much as the one in the last half of S3. One big reason for that is because the costume designers thought her dress should be very low-cut. So that's both frustrating and disappointing . . . but the show has never been the epitome of modesty.

I'm also taking a while to rewatch S1 with Chloe and Kaitlyn, but it's been fun to see how far the show has come since then. We're definitely getting close to the midway point of the season, where things are really kicked up a notch. If you somehow haven't watched this show yet, I won't spoil it for you. Suffice it to say that your mind will probably be blown.

Even though I now notice the occasional flaw or plot hole, I still absolutely love this show. To think that it's on the ninth season is kind of mind-blowing, especially when they were originally going to stop at two seasons. The episode I watched last month had some really funny moments, one of which I have to include in my next quotes post.

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This movie was just as "ugh"-inducing as the last two. While I do think it's the best of the trilogy, by no means does that mean it was a great film. Everything was so laughable; mocking these movies is not hard. (One of the worst scenes was when two police were going after Sandman, who had hidden a truck. It was one continuous shot with a shaky cameraman. It went on so long my head started hurting just by looking at the screen.) I'll never figure out why some people think Tobey Maguire is the best Spider-Man. His lack of facial expression, or any emotion at all . . . Kirsten Dunst was also one of the whiniest, unlikable girlfriend characters I've ever seen. The fact that she hated on both Garfield's and Holland's movies makes me like her even less. Just don't bother watching this trilogy, unless you want something you and your friends or siblings can mock.

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So, uh . . . I watched this movie. And it was a . . . hyped one. A hyped musical, to be precise. *clears throat*

Okay, I won't beat around the bush: I didn't like The Greatest Showman. I didn't dislike it, either. It was simply "meh" to me. One of those movies where you watch it once and you're perfectly content with never seeing it again. First off, I'm not a big musical fan to begin with. I've seen a number of them, but most don't ring with me. Some exceptions are Disney's most recent princess ventures (Tangled, Frozen, and Moana). The reason I love them so much more is because they don't focus on the singing aspect; that's just a side dish. They've got interesting plots and well-developed characters. Heck, Moana has a scene that pays homage to Fury Road! You can't really go wrong with that.

And even if The Greatest Showman has the same amount of time between songs as the abovementioned princess films, it feels shorter. Like, they're singing every five minutes (not literally, but you get my drift). As for the songs themselves, they're decent enough. But you won't find me looking them up to listen to on my own accord.

I even predicted some of the plot at the very beginning. SPOILER ALERT! I thought to myself, "I bet Barnum and his wife are gonna have marital problems, but everything will be fixed with a song." And what do you know, that's what happened. I get that different genres have their tropes, but I just can't get behind those in the musical genre.

One thing I did appreciate was the theme. It starts off as a whole "follow your dreams" thing, but then it twists and says that sometimes you have to give up on those dreams because family is more important. I thought that was a good message to give, but other than that, the movie didn't have much appeal for me. Oh yeah, and I never picked up on the regular soundtrack, so it's struck me as (potentially) bland. I feel like composers for a musical are overshadowed by the songs, generally speaking.

This is my fifth or sixth rewatch of Cap's debut, and I still love it. Do I think Marvel movies have improved since then? Of course; if they weren't improving, they'd be stagnant. And no one likes a stagnant franchise. But I was picking up on things that are either referenced or built upon in the future, and it was just cool to see Steve's origin again.

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Another rewatch for me, and it was still very emotional for me. One of those films where it feels disrespectful to get up before the credits are over. If you haven't seen this yet, you need to. It's hard to watch because of its brutal honesty, but it's a good reminder for all of us. Don't forget to have several tissues on hand.

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I came into it with no expectations, and thus, I wasn't disappointed. I don't have any desire to read the Harry Potter novels, but I decided to watch the movie series. The first one was . . . all right. My biggest complaint was the lack of an overarching plot. It did hint at stuff, but not much actually happened until the end. I might be hypocritical for complaining, though, because I absolutely adore Knightley Academy and The Secret Prince. Those books, however often they may be compared to Harry Potter, were much more enjoyable and charming for me. My favorite things about the movie were the humor, Hagrid, and Snape (whose voice I can imitate very accurately).

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I've got say, Coco is now one of my top favorite Pixar movies of all time. Not only does it have an intriguing plot, dynamic characters, an unique score, and surprising twists, but I also was just appreciating the high quality animation. Seriously, pay attention to the details, like the peach fuzz on Miguel's face or the close-up intricacy of Hector's hands, and you'll be wowed. While this movie had some songs, there weren't enough to classify it as a musical (but I liked them more than The Greatest Showman's).

I also wasn't expecting it, but this movie got emotional. I suppose I should've seen it coming, because Pixar's really good at that stuff. But I had tears running down my face at one point; the movie's theme just struck a chord with me (pun intended). SPOILER ALERT! The theme is very similar to TGS's, but I just loved how it was portrayed in Coco more.

Watch this movie. You won't regret it.

Gaming HapPENings

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I did it. I finally beat Ganondorf and saved Hyrule from eternal darkness. Now I'd rather not visit the bland world of Twilight Princess for a long, long time. I just . . . I can't even with this game. You wouldn't believe how eager I was to finish. And while the final confrontation with the Demon Lord was one of my favorite parts of the game (it doesn't take much), the tension was undercut by me using the fishing rod to distract him. It was like he'd never seen one before!

Ganondorf: "I'm big and scary, and I'm gonna kill you!"

Link: *silently whips out fishing rod and whips it past Ganondorf's head*

Ganondorf: "Ooh, would ya look at that? It's so shiny." *gets distracted and is instantly attacked by Link* "Ouchie! Foul play!"

*repeat sequence*

I won't rant more, since this post is becoming monstrous as it is. You'll just have to wait to hear my thoughts until my "Skyward Sword Versus Twilight Princess HD" post.

I've mentioned before how this game turns fantasy tropes on their head, and it continues to do so. When the princess (who, in my game, was Toon Zelda) gets captured, you expect that saving her is the end goal. Nope! You save her at the end of the first world. In fact, I'm in the fourth world right now, and I suspect I'll be having a showdown with the Dark Lord (who's Gaster from Undertale for my playthrough) to prevent him from stealing any more faces. But I also have a feeling that the game is gonna surprise me again. (Unfortunately, I might know a twist, which would've genuinely caught me off-guard. Now I'm just waiting for it to happen.)

Writerly HapPENings

I was completely occupied with working on my vlog last month, so I didn't make any progress in The Tournament of Convicts. July shall be a different story!

And I'm done! I apologize for the late and absolutely massive post. What did you guys do in June? Have you read, watched, or played any of the titles that I did? Got any goals for July?